This image popped up on my Facebook news feed, and my immediate thought? ‘I’d have another baby’. I didn’t hesitate, I didn’t think it through. It came to me at once and I typed it in response.
Fear is a powerful thing. An all consuming, life altering thing. It stops you dreaming, striving, living.
My dream of more than one child is gone. Stripped away and buried by the fear of a similar birth experience, further breastfeeding struggles and recurring post natal depression. The fear that I might bleed to death, or have to formula feed, or feel suicidal, stops me from giving Moo a sibling.
At times I long to be pregnant, to perhaps finally get the birth experience I wanted, to successfully breastfeed. But the fear that it might not go that way, or that I may not be able to mentally cope with two children, is enough to frighten me off. Why rock the (already precariously swaying) boat?
Fear can drastically alter the path you thought you might find yourself on. What’s holding you back?