Normal Vs Freak
Quite often, usually during moments of upset or rage, I find myself thinking ‘I wish I was normal, why can’t I just be a normal person?’. I feel I don’t react how I should, or cope as well as others. Like my mind doesn’t function well, that I’m laden with issues that others seem to avoid.
But then I got thinking (as I do) that maybe there’s no such thing as normal. That I’m constantly striving to be something that doesn’t even exist. Maybe we’re all freaks, wandering this earth, towing our baggage. Maybe we take all the things that society deems as acceptable, whether it’s beauty, sound mental health, career, aspirations, wealth, and create this super human super normal figure in our minds and constantly compete against ourselves to be that person. Its unobtainable. It’s not healthy.
I’m not sure how to get away from that, it seems a mammoth task. I think a good starting point could be to embrace the freakiness. Yes, we’re all a bit mental. Maybe some are just better at hiding it than others? Unless we talk about our quirks, the things we see as ‘flaws’, our mental health, we don’t see the real picture. We just see other people around us being ‘normal’. It’s time we stopped suppressing our true characters and lived authentically.
I’m a freak. I get anxious about talking on the phone. I wallow in self pity and quite often cry about things in my life that I can’t change. I’m not very confident so my hair and piercings and clothes are my mask. All things that aren’t generally accepted as ‘normal’, but I bet a million other people do the same things, and that makes me part of a pretty big club. A wonderful club, full of freaks, with no membership fee.
I hope that talking about my mental health issues will go some way towards breaking down this idea of ‘normal’. There is no such thing. We’re all just freaks, and it’s about time that was ok.